A Smart New Year’s Resolution for Those Considering Divorce
By Jami K. Fosgate, Esq.
Family Law Mediator & Collaborative Law Attorney
Fosgate Family Law and Mediation Center, Burbank, California
Happy New Year 2016! The beginning of the New Year inspires many people to resolve to make changes – the ubiquitous “New Year’s Resolution.” The most popular resolutions include “lose weight,” “exercise more,” “stop smoking,” “pay off debt,” or “save more money.” Many people look forward to the new year with hope and happiness, a time of renewal.
In the world of divorce, family law attorneys know January is the most popular month of the year to receive phone calls from potential new clients: people who already decided to divorce, but who were ‘grinning and bearing it’ during the holidays. Now that the holidays are behind us, they want to rush to the courthouse.
Since my family law attorney practice is focused on helping couples end their relationship through mediation and Collaborative methods, I urge those who have decided to divorce to take a deep breath and make a New Year’s Resolution to first learn about the options available for ending your marriage or partnership. Hiring attorneys to fight in court is not the only way.
If you’re here reading information on the Family Divorce Solutions website, perhaps it’s because you want to avoid the pain and expense involved in a litigated divorce. Perhaps you don’t want to let a stranger who knows nothing about your family make all the decisions about your post-divorce life. This is a healthy outlook and an important first step in working your way through your divorce in as healthy and productive a way as possible. I am here with good news: it is possible to divorce without going to war with your ex-spouse, and without traumatizing your children in the process. Even if you have disagreements, as long as you are willing to work hard, it is possible to work through anything.
I encourage you to learn more, first by reading other sections of the Family Divorce Solutions website, and then by giving us a call to talk with a Collaborative professional at 818-933-4504. Or visit our Member Profiles section and make an appointment with someone near you to explore your options.
Additional information on options is available for free on the California Courts website in the “Self-Help” section under “Divorce or Separation.” Select “Basics” and “Resolve Your Divorce or Separation Out of Court.”
For those people who aren’t sure about divorce and who may be struggling to decide the future of their marriage or partnership, I urge you to make a New Year’s Resolution to take steps to change the situation and try to save your marriage or partnership. Consider reading some books on what you can do to prevent a divorce or improve your relationship. Ask your spouse or partner to consider couples counseling. If he or she won’t attend counseling with you, consider counseling on your own to learn if the marriage or relationship can be salvaged.
If your marriage or relationship is foundering, then something must change or things will not improve. Please consider making a New Year’s Resolution to embrace change. Hopefully you will never need to contact me or any other family law attorney. In the event you do, Family Divorce Solutions will try to help you reach a peaceful resolution. Good luck!